Agree With the Part That Is True
When criticised, find the part that is even slightly true, agree with it first, then give your view.
A therapist's communication technique; it fits receptiveness research but is not tested itself.
Why it works
Agreeing first removes the fight. The other person stops defending and starts listening.
How to do it
- Listen for the grain of truth.
- Say it back as agreement.
- Add your view without but.
- Ask what they suggest.
What to say
You are right that the first shortlist was weak. Here is what we changed.
Yes, our fee is higher than a job portal. What you get for it is...
Avoid
Fake agreement followed by a big but. They hear only the but.
Example
A dairy CEO said Devendra's candidates were too costly. Devendra agreed they were above market, then showed the two who had stayed three years. The CEO approved the next search.
Practise it
Related